Months have blurred into years. Years have blurred into… well, more years. And you’ve blurred into someone who thinks ‘dinner’ means scrolling through delivery apps while wearing the same sweatpants you’ve owned since 2023. As you stare at another lukewarm container of questionable pad thai, you wonder: When did I last eat food that actually meant something? And also… what even exists in Hagerstown? Let’s find out.
MISSION BBQ
$ | (443) 491-8777 | WEBSITE
Nietzsche believed that there was no objective meaning or structure in the world, except for what we give it. And if that’s true, then we’re pushing all of our “things that matter” chips to the center and going all-in on MISSION BBQ.
Lunch at this barbecue joint is basically the closest thing to a patriotic celebration you can get these days, with tremendous dishes like moist beef sandwiches with various sauces, tender pulled pork, smoky brisket, and, our favorite, the banana pudding – creamy custard, vanilla wafers, and fresh bananas, all topped with whipped cream. MISSION BBQ is available for dine-in and catering, with attentive staff who show kindness to veterans, making every visit a positive experience.
40 West Deli
$ | (240) 850-2433 | WEBSITE
Did the mother-daughter team behind 40 West Deli anticipate that we’d someday be navigating a world of endless choices, overwhelming complexity, and perhaps the slow erosion of simple, honest food? It almost feels like they did – nearly every item on the menu at this unassuming deli in Hagerstown seems crafted to combat deep, gnawing feelings of culinary disappointment.
Hoagies arrive piled high with generous portions of meat and veggies, soups simmer with the warmth of daily home-cooked specials, and… they’re serving broccoli salad that people actually mention by name?? Alright, I’m convinced. Like, how can you claim nothing tastes good anymore when there’s broccoli salad that stands out? 40 West Deli is open for takeout and dine-in, find them at their address or ask the friendly, knowledgeable staff about the area.
Anthony’s Pizza
$ | (301) 665-1100 | WEBSITE
Despite how ordinary things may seem in your daily routine, there are still simple joys that make life better. Example A: A perfectly made pizza crust. Example B: Literally all of the pizza at Anthony’s Pizza. From the outside, this cozy Hagerstown Italian spot might not look like much, but everything from their standout pizza with better ingredients to wings that pair perfectly with friends is on par with what you’d expect from a beloved neighborhood place, but at affordable prices.
And when you’re getting that much value – does it even matter if the cheese fries disappoint? Anthony’s Pizza offers a quiet atmosphere with decent, nice service, and supports the local community, making it a favorite for those on a budget who love good pizza.
Rik’s Cafe
$ | (301) 302-7541 | WEBSITE
The last couple weeks have been especially difficult (ex. we finally had to make peace with the fact that our favorite crab spot closed down, and like, not as a temporary thing), but things are looking up. Rik’s Cafe is here. This is some of the best, most satisfying seafood you’ll find outside of Maryland’s Eastern Shore, so it’s time to order all of the crab pretzel, loaded tots, and Maryland Crab soup your little appetite can handle. Or, you know what? Hit your limit. Nothing matters.
Rik’s Cafe is available for takeout and delivery, call them or find them on various delivery platforms.
Dairy Queen (Treat)
$ | (301) 582-3291 | WEBSITE
If there were any restaurant in Hagerstown that could convince us of the existence of pure, simple joy, it would be Dairy Queen (Treat). This reliable ice cream spot has been serving the community for decades, and its classic treats are guaranteed to bring you back from any stressful day. The soft-serve cones are a must, the Blizzards are too, and make sure to get at least one order of their Dilly Bar – that chocolate-dipped vanilla ice cream on a stick is the perfect handheld delight.
Their staff remains attentive and helpful even during busy times, with quick order preparation that makes this a consistently satisfying stop. You can visit their Hagerstown location for takeout, or find them on various delivery platforms.
Black Rock Bar & Grill
$$ | (240) 850-3365 | WEBSITE
More than just a restaurant, it’s a lively celebration featuring personal 700-degree cook stones and steaks, back when dining rooms were still buzzing, this Hagerstown spot became one of the most entertaining places to spend a Saturday evening. And while their takeout situation definitely doesn’t match the in-house experience (no sizzling stones to-go, unfortunately), you can still play upbeat music, sip impressive cocktails, and enjoy their reliable food from the comfort of your own living room.
Which is probably better than whatever you were going to do, like watch paint dry for three hours, or pretend to organize your sock drawer. (Spoiler alert: the steak wins.) Black Rock Bar & Grill is available for takeout and delivery, call them directly or find them on your favorite delivery apps.
Hub City Nutrition – Hagerstown, MD
$ | (240) 635-9994 | WEBSITE
If you don’t find yourself feeling genuinely healthier after trying the signature protein shake from Hub City Nutrition, then damn, maybe wellness really is meaningless. But that probably won’t happen, because for just $8, this Hagerstown spot will give you a life-affirming assortment of energizing teas, delicious shakes, and wellness supplements, plus, a genuinely welcoming atmosphere.
The owners are passionate and knowledgeable, taking time to educate you on their offerings, and the staff provides personable service that makes the whole experience enjoyable. Whether it’s the great-tasting protein shakes, the energizing teas, or the overall commitment to promoting a healthier lifestyle, Hub City Nutrition is a must-visit destination.
Roy Rogers
$ | (301) 797-8300 | WEBSITE
There are plenty of fast-food joints in Hagerstown, but one of the most reliable, and certainly the most homey, is this classic spot on the main drag. Half burger haven, half self-serve fixings bar, there’s no better place in town to grab a $6 quarter-pound burger while loading up on fresh toppings or treating yourself to real ice cream.
And while they’re not offering any of their popular sodas to-go (yet), they just maintain that friendly, helpful service that makes the whole experience pleasant. Or, as it’s referred to in “The Value,” the exact combination of things we need to keep us from doing something drastic, like settling for pricier chains. Roy Rogers is available for a quick, satisfying meal, just stop by for that clean, well-maintained atmosphere.
Olive Garden Italian Restaurant
$ | (301) 582-0408 | WEBSITE
Much like our cravings for comfort and belief in consistency, Olive Garden’s approach has remained steadfast through the years. Still here are the classic Italian dishes and famous breadsticks, but in their place is a newly renovated, beautiful interior that feels both familiar and fresh. That means experiences like being warmly greeted by the friendly hostess and promptly seated in the clean, well-staffed environment, as well as attentive service from servers like Kim – a.k.a.
moments that pair really well with a reflection on life’s simple pleasures, such as ‘Can satisfaction exist without predictability?’ and ‘Honestly, where are more of those breadsticks?’ Olive Garden is available for dine-in and takeout, visit their Hagerstown location or find them online.
Rice Thai Dining
$ | (301) 766-9559 | WEBSITE
Back in the olden days – a.k.a. “last winter” – this immensely popular Thai restaurant was known to have one of the busiest dinner rushes in downtown Hagerstown. And for a good reason – their fantastic Panang curry is flat-out fantastic, and their Thai tea is sweet as hell. But what has been our move, and will always be our move, is to get the mango sticky rice, which comes with fresh mango, coconut milk, and perfectly cooked sticky rice. Looks like even on busy nights, old habits die hard.
Rice Thai Dining is available for takeout, call ahead to order.
Broad Axe
$ | (301) 733-8454 | WEBSITE
When the week is long, and your spirit is definitely flagging, the only sensible solution is to head to Broad Axe (and probably order some appetizers). From crispy, loaded crab nachos served with a zesty sauce to hearty fish and cheese sandwiches, everything on the menu at Broad Axe is ideal for when you need a little extra satisfaction. Or, let’s be real, a lot of extra satisfaction.
Broad Axe is just a short drive from the Hampton Inn I-81, call them or find them on most major delivery platforms.
Foster’s on the Point
$$ | (301) 739-7182 | WEBSITE
Things that are bad for quelling nihilism: Chain restaurants with generic menus, sterile atmospheres that feel like waiting rooms, and servers who treat you like a transaction number. Things that are good for quelling nihilism: Cozy neighborhood spots with slammin’ burgers and friendly bar staff. In other words, Foster’s on the Point. They’ve got some of the best comfort food in town, from pork belly ends that melt in your mouth to the On Point burger stacked with all the fixings.
The choice is yours… or is it? Foster’s on the Point offers that welcoming owner’s hospitality and excellent service – perfect for both locals looking for a reliable meal and visitors wanting a taste of Hagerstown’s dining scene.
Taco Bell
$ | (301) 739-3752 | WEBSITE
From late-night cravings to those moments when you’re rushing between errands (read: most afternoons), this reliable Hagerstown spot has been there for me. And while they do offer vegetarian options, as well as a helpful staff and some of the most efficient drive-thru service around, whenever I need a quick pick-me-up that feels like a treat, I go for the crispy Chicken Empanada.
This satisfying item, with its flaky crust and savory filling, somehow manages to be comforting, flavorful, and just indulgent enough at the same time, and is exactly what you want when you’re on the road and think “I deserve this.” Taco Bell is available for drive-thru and mobile order pickup, check their app to order, or find them on various delivery platforms.
